Shallow Thoughts by Jeff

Many of these will be very offensive and politically incorrect.

——

You don’t have to tell people there’s going to be a beep when leaving a message. They already know that.

“Finding a bathroom can eventually become a process of elimination.”
–Accidentally made up by an unnamed friend of mine, which I slightly reworded

Have you ever noticed that it’s almost always pastors who say you need to become a member of a ‘church’? Much worse, that you should “tithe” beyond your means. Um, Paul was saying what the Philippians did, not what people should do. I’ll stop there before I get driven out of blogdom. (Although this stuff is politically incorrect, I don’t mean to offend or ‘go after’ all pastors here. It’s just the idea–and a hotly debated one.)

By Biblical definition, our heart is also our head. I hate to tell you this, but there is no gulf between our head and heart. The two terms aren’t mutually exclusive. Intellectual knowledge vs. true belief may be more to the point in some cases. There may be a post on this someday.

How do you “ask Jesus into your heart”? Could someone tell me what verse this comes from? Do we have the authority to do that? Isn’t it the other way around?

Do we “accept Jesus” or does He accept us? (The NLT and GNT ruined this for me. How could they do that?)

Whenever somebody says they, “Ran into a friend of mine”, I wonder if they got hurt.

The word “share” seems to finally be on the decline after decades of overuse. Or maybe my mind is sparing me and I just don’t notice it as much. I hope the same happens with “comfort zone” and “closure” and asking and answering your own questions. Do these things drive me nuts? Yes. Is there anything I can do about it? Unfortunately, no, other than calling these people dweebs, one at a time.

Speaking of overused words–I know John Piper wants his translation (version) of the Bible to have “all of the words”, but we don’t need the word “for” at the beginning of every sentence in English. Really. I’ve asked. (Read 1 Cor. 1:17 through the end of the chapter in the ESV.) I’m sure there is something else to base a sermon on. And by the way, as much as I like them, I think it would be just great if the big three–Sproul, MacArthur and Piper, would never ever be allowed to say anything about translations ever again. Please forgive me for my lack of humility towards my elders. They have shaped my view of God’s sovereignty in very major, life changing way during the time that I needed it most.

I don’t care what some Baptists on a committee think about the new NIV any more than I care what liberals think about guns. The NIV and guns will always be there and they both work pretty well for good or bad.

Some praise choruses cause many people to (unknowingly) lie, like when they sing, “I Surrender All”. The more you lose, the more you realize how difficult it is to Surrender All. Maybe I’m taking it too literally, but that’s how the song is worded. It could have said it’s a goal or frame of mind.

What if the leader says to pray if you “feel” led and I don’t feel led but I still want to pray?

All of my blogging and Facebook friends are great about handling my comments and prayer requests regarding chronic suffering of various sorts. How is it that all of them know not to give dumb advice and just give a word of encouragement and/or let me know they will pray? Those of us who suffer chronically will tell you it can be a nightmare when it comes to the “advice”. I can’t tell you how nice this is not to have to be afraid every time I post something personal in that regard. I’m very thankful for that.

9 Responses to “Shallow Thoughts by Jeff”


  1. 1 Alondra

    LOVE IT!! That was probably the most intellagent thing I have read in a long time!! AND THANK YOU FOR THAT LAST PART!! I still do fear, I know the ‘advice givers’ are motivated by love, but if it was that easy I would be better by now!! anyways thanks for that!!

  2. 2 Scripture Zealot

    Wow Alondra, thanks for commenting. I know it’s difficult for you. I am glad you like it.
    Jeff

  3. 3 THEOparadox

    Jeff,

    Thanks for sharing these thoughts. I know it was hard to get out of your comfort zone and write these things, and it’s going to be difficult to get closure on some of them, but keep processing until you achieve it. Did I say something wrong? I hope not. But you really need not suffer if you just have more faith (and send money to televangelists)! [/sarcasm]

    Sorry, couldn’t resist.

    Blessings,
    Derek

  4. 4 Nancy

    How do you “ask Jesus into your heart”? Could someone tell me what verse this comes from? Do we have the authority to do that? Isn’t it the other way around?

    –When you hear Him knocking, you say come in…*; ) Rev3:20

  5. 5 Scripture Zealot

    Derek, at least you didn’t say anything about the ESV! Thanks for pushing my buttons. Your reply was in the spirit of my post. I like it.

    Nancy, well that’s probably about as close as it gets. You know Scripture when serious and smileying.
    Jeff

  6. 6 Gary Zimmerli

    Hey Jeff, re: the word “for”, maybe we could consult with the late Victor Borge and use his inflationary language. They could all start with “five”.

  7. 7 THEOparadox

    Gary, that is great. This is just hilarious!

    I never knew Borge had this routine.

  8. 8 Scripture Zealot

    Gary, that’s great. I’m just barely old enough to remember him.
    Jeff

  9. 9 Dave

    Nancy,
    Rev 3:20 was written to Christians. It is only an evangelistic verse when ripped out of context.

    The closest thing to “accepting” Jesus actually found in the Bible is found in John 1 where we are told that salvation is found in “receiving” Jesus. I think that term requires a lot more of an individual than “accepting” does.

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